"Anyone can have one kid. But going from one kid to two is like going from owning a dog to running a zoo." - P. J. O'Rourke

Saturday, January 7, 2012

And Now For Something Completely Different

This is scary!  Very scary!  I'm turning over this blog post to......Molly!  NEVER, EVER have I let anyone else write on my blog, but....I'm feeling rather generous tonight.

I may regret this!

Here's Molly....

First of all the title of this blog post is: Insanity. How it rules our lives. an article by M. E. J.

       The information here has been gather from a very reliable insane source. Namely me. Now you may all think that from reading this blog long enough you know pretty much everything that goes on here. Who the kids are, what their personalities are like, how funny we are, how stupid we are (heh, heh) etc. Well i'd like you all to know that you are being deceived. (slightly) or rather hidden from the truth. the Barb who writes these posts is a very different Barb then the one i know and love. First off the Barb here is rather normal compared to the Barb i live with. Those who have met her can agree with me on this. at least those who have known her long enough.

        Now let us take a little journey into the ACTUAL life of Barb. Let's begin with her children. As you well know the way children act is greatly because of the way they have been raised.  First up is Evan. He plays the bagpipes. This is not a bad thing (note: none of the things listed here are negative simply different of strange). This instrument is not the most common of instruments chosen by most children.

(Since there are so many children we shall move through them quickly with only one example of the insanity). Second is the beloved Nina. She ... she... maybe the fact that i can't think of anything insane about her is an insane thing about her. Next comes me. I am a perfectly normal person as you all know. Fourth is Aidan. He is rather skilled in his muscular abilities. Why is this strange? One would have to be strange to spend so much time getting muscular, wouldn't you say? Fifth is darling Emily. Emily enjoys drawing picture stories of large families doing strange things. Sixth is Marcus. Marcus is much too skilled at cleaning for it to be natural. who else can fold a blanket into a perfect square without thinking? Seventh is Raelea.  Raelea enjoys filling out forms more then anything else in the world. Eighth is Zoe who is rather fond of roll playing games in which she is the character of the... dog. Now you know a bit more about our family and this mysterious Barb.
We shall now move on to her music likes and dislikes. Again none of these things are bad simply different. As we all know she loves the band Mumford & Sons with a passion. Did anyone notice the time when she posted a Mumford & Sons video EVERY day? She is also very particular about the male and female voices she likes. If they aren't exactly up to notch she doesn't like them. (or as she would put it, not wanting to offend anyone, she doesn't CARE for it)
The next is her dislike of snakes. I like snakes. And she doesn't. And I want her to like snakes so i can get one. Just a harmless little gardener snake that only harms the dead mice you have to feed it once a week. What is the problem with that. I see none. I wouldn't even let it out unaccompanied.
Fourth is the fact that i just realized that most of these things on here you already probably know. meaning that you do indeed know the REAL Barb. Congratulations and I hope you have enjoyed this blog post. I have the feeling i will regret this tomorrow but oh well.

Oh by the way another weird thing about Barb is as i was just starting this post she informed me that to her this felt like letting a stranger have her baby. Yes, dear blog you read that right. She thinks you are a baby. I'm so sorry. I fare thee all a fond farewell. Until next time. There will never be a next time just so you know.

                          The End

Now you know why I don't have guest bloggers!  And who is this child's teacher anyway?  She seems to have a capitalization problem!  Hmm, I think I just found some things we can work on in school next week....SCORE!  Mom wins again!

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