Freedom = the state of not being imprisoned or enslaved
Future Grace = the grace (gifts) God promises us, but we have not yet received (e.g., heaven)
Mumford & Sons = an English folk band
What do the three have in common?
Through my decision to go on the
Amazing Middle-Aged Moms' Road Trip, I discovered that there were people that wanted to "imprison or enslave" me into their belief that, as a Christian, I should not be embarking on an apparently obsessive journey to Kansas City to hear a "secular" band of young men sing.
This hurt my heart - deeply - because the God I know and love made me and he LOVES me the way he made me. And while some people find their relationship with God strengthened only through "Christian" music and or literature, I am not one of those people. God put in me a mind that loves beauty, that loves the beauty of words, that loves to be challenged to think and not be spoon-fed, that loves music! When I hear or see beautiful things I feel God's presence in ways I cannot explain. It is like a glimpse of Heaven to me - where all things will be beautiful.
When I read books like Les Miserables or The Brothers Karamazov my heart draws near to God. I think deeply about forgiveness and the cost and responsibilities that come with it. They challenge my brain and my soul. Theses "non-Christian" books do more for my walk with the Lord than many devotionals I have read. My God, who is very large and very powerful, is able to speak to my heart through literature that may or may not have been intended to bring Him glory.
Likewise, my God, who is very large and very powerful, is able to speak to
my heart through music that is sung and written by people who may, or may not, be seeking His glory. And I have freedom in Him to worship Him through such music.
This brings us to the future grace and Mumford & Sons part of this post :-)
Much of their music touches the very innermost part of my soul. I cannot explain it to you. It resonates with something deep down inside of me. When I listen to (or sing), "love that will not betray you, dismay or enslave you, it will set you free, to be more like the man you were made to be" my heart screams, "YES! I know that love! That is the love that Jesus shows me!" Future grace!
When I listen to (or sing), "there is a design, an alignment, a cry, of my heart to see, the beauty of love as it was made to be," my heart prays, "Jesus, show me that love!" Future grace. We will indeed see that beautiful love, in all of its glory, some day!
When I listen to (or sing - with tears) "
And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears.
And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears.
Get over your hill and see what you find there,
With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair." Well, my heart just cries for that day! Future grace.
There.
I've explained it the best that I can. I've exposed some deep corners of my heart to the entire world - not something I really enjoy doing, but something I felt that I must do. No doubt I will still have people make judgement calls on my heart. I can't change that. I rest in the love of the God who made me, who delights in me, who does know my innermost heart...
As an aside, I just want to say to my friends and family who are walking with me through this, who know me well and still love me, thank you! I LOVE YOU AND I SO VERY MUCH APPRECIATE YOUR LOVE FOR ME! Thank you for letting me be who God made me to be! You are a treasure, a gift from my Heavenly Father, which I hold very dear to my heart!