"Anyone can have one kid. But going from one kid to two is like going from owning a dog to running a zoo." - P. J. O'Rourke

Saturday, September 21, 2013

The Cost of Adoption

Since we've done this adoption thing a few times, people frequently ask us questions about adopting.  Sometimes they're just curious, but often they are interested in adopting themselves.  They want to know "how it all works."

One question that comes up frequently is, "How much does adoption cost?"  Pretty straightforward question...or is it?  I could (and sometimes do) give a dollar amount.  Let's see, domestically it costs about $15,000 to $30,000.  Internationally it costs upward of $25,000.  It's expensive!

Usually, I leave my answer at that.  This week however, I have been reflecting on REAL cost of adopting.

"How much does adoption cost?"

It will cost you your life.

The dollar amounts above no longer look like much when put in proper perspective.  The checks written out to finance your adoption are the easiest, least painful cost you will pay.

I'm not anti-adoption.  I LOVE adoption!  I am very pro-adoption!!  I am also very pro-truth!  No one is benefited when something is promoted in ignorance.  No one.

So what do I mean by "it will cost you your life?"  Well, all parenting costs you your life in some sense.  Once you become a parent, you will learn to die to your selfish desires.  You will give up sleep.  You will give up hobbies.  You will give up a clean house.  The list goes on and on.

When you adopt, you may have to add to the "normal" list.  You may give up being understood by most other parents.  You may give up your vacation because you need to pay for therapy for your child.  You may give up time alone with your spouse because you can't leave your kids with a babysitter.  You may give up being loved back by a child you love.  You may give up being safe in your own home.

Does adoption always cost those things?  No, of course not.  Does it sometimes cost that much?  Yes, and sometimes much more.

Is it worth the price you pay?  Absolutely.  It may not always FEEL worth it, but it IS most definitely worth it.

"Truly, truly I say to you, unless a grain of what falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit."  - Jesus (John 12:24)

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